Still Life: 01. My Lists for November
The little things teaching me, grounding me, inspiring me.
If there is one thing I’ve noticed in my early (almost 7) years of motherhood, it’s how often I look back on past moments or chapters with a kind of tender longing. Why is that?
It’s not because they were perfect, but because I’ve grown so much since then. Sometimes I wish I could step back into those days as the steadier version of myself I am now.
This idea has given me a lot of comfort. It frees me from needing to know everything right now and reminds me that every day I’m gathering a little more wisdom just by living it. It helps me pause and look around, even on hard days, because these are the moments I’ll someday miss.
So, the Still Life series is a way to honor that growth: little lists of what’s holding me, teaching me, or inspiring me in real time. A way to collect the wisdom while I’m still inside the moment.
I’ll keep it simple, counting down from 5:
5 Things I Want to Remember
4 Things Making Life Easier
3 Things That Make Me Feel Like Myself
2 Things I’m Curious About (although tricky to pare down to 2!)
1 Thing to Leave You With
5 Things I Want to Remember
The joy of jumping in the leaves, now relived through my own children. They have spent hours this past week inventing games, moving slides around and burying each other in our last big pile of leaves. As I comb little brown leaf bits out of their hair (and into my lap) at the end of the day, I can’t help but smile.
The way my youngest sits in my lap. A friend recently asked me if he has that characteristic slow, clumsy way of sitting 15-month olds often do, and he totally does. He will stumble over with a book that looks so heavy, slowly turn around, then sit in some sort of awkward perch on the edge of one knee. Then I pull him in and we snuggle up and read. :)
The surprising gentle hand of my 3-year-old. She is so animated, sometimes wild, with a force about her that draws you in, like the best sort of black hole. But with her little brother, she gently places her hand behind is back and guides him around, calmly hands things to him, carefully observes his responses. It’s so unexpected and entirely tender.
My oldest daughter’s baby teeth. She lost her bottom 2 a long time ago, and I think her front teeth will be gone soon too. Her babyness slips away so fast these days!
My husband’s capacity for silliness. He can tap into play so easily, jumping over pavement cracks, dancing to girly song videos, hiding and seeking, baby wrestling (amazing how fast that boy energy shows up)… he’s never afraid to be dumb, and I love that about him - I don’t know if he realizes it, but the playfulness he weaves into their day forms core memories for them.
4 Things Making Life Easier
Single skillet meals that are hearty and warm. I spend a lot of time thinking about meals we can eat that a) help me meet my own goals, b) everyone will eat, c) are gentle on my middle child’s GI system and d) are reasonably simple to make. It’s a tricky needle to thread! I often take easy, one-pan meals like these Skillet Enchiladas or, yesterday, this Turkey Butternut Squash Skillet Lasagna, and make some tweaks to amp up the protein/limit the starchy carbs (like using almond flour tortillas and adding beans in the first, using Goodles protein pasta in the second).
Sock curls. I’m sure this is not a new thing to most, but if it is, search “sock curls” on Pinterest. My hair doesn’t have the best natural texture, but I have been trying to limit heat tools, so now I curl my hair once every 3 days, and maintain the curl each night with socks! It’s quite a bedtime look, but we millennials are totally fine looking insane when we sleep at night, what with heatless curls, mouth tape, eye masks, sheet masks, thermal pajamas, and everything else, so really it’s normal. :)
Space for mess. I will talk more about this in an upcoming piece, but I am no stranger to being triggered by a mess. Because of this, though, I am a huge fan of setting up your home in a way that works with the mess. One example: we made a whole space in our utility room that is just for my oldest daughter to do her art (she often invites little sis in). She can be as messy as she needs to be to bring her imagination to life and I don’t have to look at it if I don’t want to!
One water bottle for all of my water. I don’t have strong preferences for a water bottle type - I have this one because it’s easy. But I do like when they hold a third of my daily water intake goals so all I know is that I have to drink 3 of them. I can’t add odd glasses full here and there and I hate tracking when I don’t have to, so this is fool-proof and simple.
3 Things That Make me Feel Like Myself
Bright scarves that my mom knitted for me. I’ve always been one for a pop of red, and now I’m exploring other colors, like warm yellow, cobalt blue, and kelly green. I’m loving the playful energy they bring. (PS I’m so eager to learn how to knit.)
Hair bows. Starting a collection of ribbons and hair ties with bows again make me feel like I’m living the romantic style I always admire on others. I love easy options like this and this. (Also there’s a matching knitted scrunchie to my aforementioned scarf I’m obsessed with.)
Sketching. I have a tiny sketchbook that sits on my desk now and I take breaks now and then to just play around. I’m slowly unwinding the inhibitions I’ve built up since my days in art school, and trying to exercise my creative muscles rather than just recreating what I’ve seen before. It’s a real but good challenge. I’d eventually love to take on some more regimented practices like the ones laid out in The Artist’s Way, but for now this fits my life well.
2 Things I’m Curious About
Winter outings as a family. The shift in weather has really been weighing on me, especially on weekends. I don’t like the feeling like we are reverting back to “surviving” some days, but that is what it feels like lately. I’m wondering what it might feel like to all get out of the house, whether together or not, on a Saturday morning. We usually just lay low Saturday mornings and try to go somewhere later on, but now it gets dark so early. I want to weave some more culture back into our family rhythm, so I’m curious what sorts of discoveries I might find if we push past the inconvenience and head to a museum, new library or the like. I would love some suggestions - please comment! :)
Bringing color and pattern to our home. Just like the scarves, I am ready to break up the beige of our living spaces in a more powerful way. Dreaming these days of wallpaper, trim and art pieces that add character to our home. The simplest touches, like this skinny red frame or these unexpected pillows make these changes feel attainable without spending tons of money.
1 Thing I Leave You With
What are your 5, 4, 3 and 2? Are you like me, constantly thinking and reflecting? I so encourage you to set your thoughts free - don’t quietly admire but also don’t hold back the wisdom you’ve earned! In my reader’s chat, I ask what you’re savoring lately, and I’m loving reading your responses. We push ourselves so hard to grow and flourish in our lives - sometimes it’s nice to reflect and sit in the stillness.
Deuvia teaches the practice. Life Savor tells the story.
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